


Baby Surprise

by Hobbit_Riddlebird



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, Justice League (2017), Man of Steel (2013), Superman (Comics), Superman - All Media Types
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, Attempt at Humor, Clones, Light Angst, M/M, Not Cheating, Secret Children, Secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:04:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22812730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hobbit_Riddlebird/pseuds/Hobbit_Riddlebird
Summary: When Clark breaks a date with Bruce.. Bruce discovers the secret Clark is hiding from him is the last thing he expected.. a baby!Rated T for some language and sexually suggestive mentions.
Relationships: Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne
Comments: 25
Kudos: 282





	Baby Surprise

**Author's Note:**

> Sort of takes place in DCEU-verse.. sort of takes place in comic-verse...

Bruce wanted to dress very carefully for his date with Clark. He wanted to dress nice but not so nice that he made the other man living on a modest reporter salary feel uncomfortable in his own apartment.

He finally decided on a dark blue suit and jacket that he wore while visiting the Wayne Enterprises factories. He could already hear Clark teasing him about wearing something other than black but wearing black in Metropolis was about as suspicious as wearing white would be in Gotham. 

He was even wearing a little surprise for Clark under his trousers, Superman briefs that he had ordered online without Alfred's knowledge, like he was sixteen and purchasing pornography from the web, complete with Superman's trademark 'S' covering the crotch. Not that their relationship had quite gotten past that point... yet. 

Thus far there had only been intense, very intense, make out sessions in his Porsche, in Clark's Honda, in Perry White's office at the Daily Planet, in the men's room at the most prestigious restaurant in Metropolis, and even once in the War Room at the Watchtower, which had been a close call when Barry came back early from a mission. But Clark had dropped hints that tonight the deal would finally be closed. 

Bruce winced. He didn't want to be like that with Clark. With Clark it wasn't just another deal, or an affair. Clark was special and not just because he was also Superman. 

No, with Clark it was different. 

His cellphone rang with the song 'Holding out for a Hero', he knew his own ringtone in Clark's phone was 'Total Eclipse of the Heart', Bruce had vetoed 'Bat out of Hell' as a little too on the nose. Clark hated his ringtone, thinking Bruce was making fun of him, and maybe it had started off that way but it had become sincere somewhere along the line. 

"Bruce," he placed the phone on speaker while choosing a tie. He sorted through the red ones, Clark's favorite color was red because of course it was. 

"Bruce, it's Clark," Bruce thought it positively charming that Clark still answered his mobile phone like an old fashioned rotary telephone despite the fact he wasn't even old enough to have had one. "I'm calling to cancel our date," his voice sounded strained to Bruce, as he tended to sound when keeping his powers back in a fight. "Something came up." 

It happened in their line of work, Bruce knew that as well as either of them. But he also knew Clark well enough to know when he was keeping something from him. 

"A Clark something or a Superman something?" he asked nonchalantly. 

"Um, neither," Clark muffled the phone but Bruce thought he heard something through the phone that sounded like another person giggling. "Both." 

"Personal or Professional?" Bruce started to wrap the tie around his hand. He hated the suspicions clouding his thought. He sat on the bed.

"Something of both I suppose," Clark sighed over the phone. "You sound angry." 

"I'm not angry," he put the tie down. He wasn't. Despite what the others thought, he did not get angry. And he could never be angry with Clark besides. 

"Disappointed then," Clark said. "I can hear it in your voice." 

There had to be a logical explanation, he thought. This was Clark for Superman's sake! 

"I'll get over it," he picked the phone back up. "I'm more disappointed that you don't trust me enough with the truth." And there it was, he almost wished he could take it back but what was done was done. 

'Your problem Bruce is you try to put a leash on everyone you love and you can't leash a cat without it eventually turning on you,' Selina had told him right before breaking up with him for the last time. 'And anyone you can't leash you push away. I can't do this anymore.' In the end Selina had known him too well for it to have worked between them. And he did not want to make the same mistake with Clark. 

"What do you mean?" Bruce heard Clark mute the phone before coming back. "I trust you, Bruce. More than anyone, you know that." 

And the thing was he did know that. And he trusted Clark too, it was what made their partnership so strong. 

"Then tell me what's really going on, Clark," Bruce spoke calmly. "We'll face whatever it is you don't want to tell me together." And in that moment he knew he meant every word. 

"It's not that I don't want to tell you, Bruce. I can't, not yet. But I will... soon. No-," Bruce heard a scuffle and the phone drop followed by a sound that could very well have been something, or someone, crashing into a table. 

"Clark?" Bruce stood, phone gripped to his ear he started heading for the door. "Damn you, just pick up the phone and tell me you bumped into the end table and broke it again, Clark?" He was trying not to panic, it wasn't as though Clark couldn't take care of himself whatever it was.

"Shit," Clark did not curse often but Bruce recognized his voice. It sounded like Clark was trying to pick up the phone but the last thing that Bruce heard before the phone went silent was... a baby crying. 

He tried to call Clark back but it went straight to voicemail, which could mean anything but he suspected Clark, or someone, had declined the incoming call. 

Bruce did not have to think. He would update Alfred on the way. He was tempted to take the Batmobile, it would be fastest, but he did not have the time to change suits. 

Before heading out he put on the blue and red tie he had still been holding in his hands.

* * *

In the end his custom Ferrari got him to Clark's flat in downtown Metropolis almost as fast as the Batmobile would have gotten him there.

Bruce flipped open the com on the dash. "I'm here, Alfred. You know the drill, contact Diana if I don't give the all clear in forty-five minutes." 

"Better make it a full sixty minutes," Alfred responded dryly. "Wouldn't want to interrupt your date too soon, I am still holding out hope for a natural Wayne heir after all."

Despite the situation Bruce chuckled. "I don't think that's quite how biology works, Alfred." 

"Master Clark is an extraterrestrial being, Master Bruce," Alfred responded. "Who knows how his biological reproduction works." 

"I don't believe it works like that," he paused, it wasn't like he could ask Clark and it hadn't exactly come up. "You think I'm overreacting, don't you?"

"You rushed out of the manor without the suit, without backup, and without the tools of your trade," Alfred sighed loudly. "Why would I think you are overreacting?" 

"I'm worried about him, Alfred," Bruce admitted. His logic told him Clark could take care of himself but his heart reminded him that Superman had already died once. And Bruce couldn't take losing someone else he cared about.

"I know," Alfred spoke fondly. "And that is what gives me hope. It has been too long since you have cared about what happens to another, maybe you will start to care about yourself as well. Your parents know I have tried my best. Perhaps Master Clark will succeed where I failed." 

"You didn't fail me, Alfred," Bruce hated that Alfred took the blame for what had happened. "I did that all on my own." 

"I think we both did, Master Bruce," Alfred chuckled quietly. "Now go get your Superman, I'm still waiting impatiently for those grandbabies. Alfred out." The com went quiet. 

Bruce wanted to tell Alfred all the things he never could but his old butler was even better than him at burying feelings behind barbed words. 

But there was no time at the present, as Alfred had so delicately put it he had a Superman rescue. 

He had tried to reach Clark through his cellphone several times during the drive with the same result as before. He thought about calling Lois Lane, or Martha Kent, to check if either woman had heard from him but he knew whatever Clark had gotten himself into he wouldn't want them involved. He called his cellphone one more time.

'You've reached Clark Kent, if it's an emergency please call 911 otherwise leave your name and number and I'll get back to you after I'm done saving cats out of trees.' 

'Bruce!'

Bruce didn't even crack a smile that Clark had kept his message. 

"Hey, Clark, it's Bruce, I'm in Metropolis, parked outside your building actually, I know you said you didn't want me to come but I'm worried about you. If you're screening your calls just call me back and tell me you're fine and I'll turn around and go back to Gotham." He disconnected the call and waited a full minute for Clark to respond before getting out of the car. 

He respected Clark's boundaries but he had given him a chance. 

Bruce entered the front lobby and climbed the stairs to Clark's floor. He encountered no one on the way to his door. He knocked loudly. "Clark? It's Bruce, I'm coming in," he called out, knowing he was also warning anyone else who could be in there with Clark of his presence. He used the key Clark had entrusted him with in the case of an emergency. 

At first nothing seemed out of place in the flat. He had only been there once and that was before they had started dating but he had thought at the time how much the space suited Clark, somehow he had managed to bring Kansas to Metropolis. But nothing seemed broken and there was no sign of a struggle. 

He shut and locked the door and stepped farther into the flat. "Are you in here, Clark?" He cursed, he didn't even know where to start if Clark wasn't even here. And that was when he spotted the cellphone where it had been dropped and above it- 

An infant was laid on the armchair wrapped in Clark's, or rather Superman's, red cape. The infant appeared to be asleep but when he stepped closer and looked down the infant started crying in the way of babies. He looked around figuring if someone was still here they would come at the sound but no one revealed themselves.

"Hey, shhh, it's okay," his instinct kicked in and he picked up the baby, carefully holding his head, for he saw he was definitely a boy when the cape slipped. He wrapped the baby boy back up and very gently rocked him. "Hey, come on stop crying," he let the baby take his finger and the baby immediately put it in his mouth and sucked on it like a pacifier. "Where did you come from, huh?" 

And where had Clark gone, it wasn't like him to leave a baby alone like this no matter where the baby had come from.

Bruce looked down at the baby in his arms, at the black hair with curl, the blue eyes he knew so well looking up at him, the same blue eyes, he thought.

"Clark?" he asked the baby and the baby blinked. "Clark, it is you isn't it?" He felt ridiculous talking to his boyfriend that had somehow been turned into a baby. "I'll figure out how to get you back," he got his phone out and dialed. "But in the meantime I'll make sure you're taken care of." 

"So I take it there was no trouble," Alfred answered the phone without any greeting. 

"I wouldn't say that," Bruce was reluctant to put Clark down. "I need you to do something for me. Order everything that is needed for taking care of an infant." 

"Delightful, Master Bruce. I see you have taken my advice," Alfred responded dryly. "Delivery set for nine months I assume." 

"Very funny, Alfred," he cut in. "Delivery needed immediately." 

"If this is a prank may I remind you the credit cards are in your name," Alfred was not laughing. 

"No prank. No time to explain," he wasn't even sure he could. "No expense spared, set everything up in the old nursery." 

"And may I inquire on the sex of the child? For decorating purposes of course." 

"The baby is Clark, Alfred," it sounded even more ridiculous out loud. 

"Very well," Alfred did not miss a beat, "red and blue it is. Shall I order some bats too, to represent both fathers?" 

"No, red and blue is sufficient," he sighed in defeat. 

"I will have it done by the time you return with the little bundle of joy," Alfred answered. "Will that be all?" 

"That is all," he disconnected the call. 

Bruce didn't notice him until he spoke.

"Bruce?" Clark asked. "What are you doing here?" 

"Clark?" Bruce turned around, Clark stood in the doorway to the bedroom in sweats and nothing else, his hair and chest damp as though he had just gotten out of the shower, or had worked up a good sweat- he slammed that kind of thinking to a stop. Wait! If Clark was here then this baby was not him, he placed the quieted infant back on the chair. He moved towards Clark not sure if he wanted to punch him or kiss him. He grabbed the back of Clark's head and slammed his mouth against his. Clark's arms reached around his waist as the other man kissed him back. 

It still surprised Bruce that the boy scout was so good at this but in this he was no match for Bruce. He put his hand down the sweat pants and Clark pressed harder against him, then-

The cry of the baby reminded them both of his presence. Bruce had been so relieved to find Clark alive and well, and in his own body, that he had forgotten about the baby in the room. 

Bruce broke away and smacked Clark's chest. "What do you call that?" He pointed towards the baby. 

"A baby?" Clark smiled, his charm may have worked on most people but it wouldn't deter Bruce.

"Yes, I know it's a baby. What is it doing here?" Bruce backed away from Clark. "It's yours isn't it?" 

He saw Clark take a deep breath. "Yes," he said simply. 

Okay, he thought quickly, the baby didn't have to change anything between them. Assuming the pregnancy had lasted nine months, and they had started dating only a few weeks ago, Clark had not cheated. Hell, he could have a few Wayne illegitimate children running around Gotham himself for all he knew. But one fact remained, Clark was not the type to abandon the mother. 

"Who's the mother?" Lois, he thought, who else could it be. Although he had seen her not even a month ago and there had been no hint of pregnancy. And neither was she the type to leave a baby on the father's doorstep.

"There isn't one," Clark held out his hands.

"I know Kryptonian reproduction is bound to have some differences than that of Earthlings," he gestured at Clark. "But if you're stating you somehow, I don't know, gave birth I think I would've noticed something." 

"Our biology is not really so different, Bruce," Clark out down his arms. "The baby was born in a lab, free of a womb." 

"Who?" he asked but he already knew the answer, didn't he. 

"Lex Luther," Clark moved to stand between Bruce and the baby. "He got a sample of my blood during the fight between us two and using Kryptonian technology cloned this child." 

"So the baby is technically you," Bruce laughed. "When I first came in and found the baby and you were missing, I thought you had been turned into an infant." 

"That's not possible," Clark frowned. 

"And this is?" Bruce gestured towards the baby. "When were you planning on telling me?" 

"I wanted to tell you," Clark stepped closer to him. "But I wasn't sure how you would react. I have to protect this baby, the last son of Krypton, even from you. I'm sorry, Bruce." 

"You thought I would be capable of harming a baby?" Bruce was beyond shocked, he was hurt. "Your baby?" 

"He is half Kryptonian," Clark turned his head to look at the infant. "And the first time you met someone from my planet you tried to kill me." 

"Not the first time," Bruce raised his eyebrow. Bruce remembered their first meetings quite differently it would seem. "Wait a minute, half Kryptonian? What's the other half?" 

Clark looked at him patiently. "Human. The baby is a human and Kryptonian hybrid." 

Bruce actually felt his stomach drop. "Who is the human half?" 

"I didn't want you to find out like this," Clark stepped forward. "Please believe me." 

"Who? Clark?" Bruce made a fist to control his anger. 

"It's you," Clark stopped. "Lex Luther took both of our blood from the battle and used it to create in his words, the superior being, the ultimate fighter." 

Bruce felt stuck in time. He was a father. Him! And Clark was apparently the other father. He couldn't help himself, he started laughing. 

"Bruce? Are you okay?" Clark asked worried.

"I knew Kryptonian biology was bound to have its differences," he laughed. "But we haven't even had sex yet and I'm already a father." 

"Then you would want this... him... me?" Clark sounded unsure for the first time.

"Of course, you need to ask," Bruce took Clark's arms. "Clark, look at me, I have Alfred setting up the old nursery in Wayne Manor as we are speaking, yes, I want this." 

"But you didn't even know the baby was half you," Clark looked him in the eye. 

"No, but I knew he was a part of you," Bruce brushed hair away from Clark's face. "Or at least I thought he was you and that was enough." 

"I still can't believe you thought I'd been turned into an infant," he shook his head. 

"What about Lex Luther, will he come after us do you think?" Us, he realized what that word meant to him now. 

"No," Clark quickly answered. "I think he is... curious on how the boy will grow up but his interest is one of observer only. I think he sees himself as something like a god to the boy. He will likely cause some sort of problem once the boy gets older but we'll be ready for him then." 

"Does he have a name?" 

"Lex Luther called him Experiment 13," Clark went over to the baby and and picked him up. Bruce could tell Clark was trying to be gentle but his hold was clumsy. "Which is of course no name for a child, I was thinking of naming him Kon-El after my paternal grandfather, Conner for his Earth name. I mean, if you approve I suppose, as his other father you should have a say as well." 

"Conner Kent-Wayne," Bruce touched the infant on the head, as though baptizing him with the name. "I admit the name has a certain strength to it," he smiled. "I like it." 

"What happens now?" Clark asked.

"Now we both go back to the manor with Kon-El here and introduce Alfred to his new grandson," Bruce chuckled. "He's never going to let it down that he was right." 

It had been too long since Wayne Manor had a child running up and down the halls, too long since the Batman had a Robin, a half Kryptonian Robin. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!!
> 
> This fic takes place in the Batman vs Superman universe so though we know something happened to the Robin of that universe I left the identity of that Robin unanswered as it is in the movie.


End file.
